The 'Meeting'

TREV · Post by **TREV** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 4:07 pm

Felt it was too big of a thing to write back in the other thread so I just made a new one.

So ya know about me and her talking and all that, well here we go.

Ok well the 'meeting' ended an hour or 2 ago. My advice to all: never pre-plan events. It nevers goes exactly the way you intend it to, want it to, or believe it to. This would be one of those times..cuz it didn't go at all as I expected.

Suffice it to say, we opened up to eachother better then I expected. Once we got into talking and all, I wasn't as nervous. Near the end I asked her if she felt awkward or not, she replied "Not really no." Now wether or not that was the 100% truth or not, I'll probably never know. But I do feel like everything we said was the honest to god truth.

It's a lot different talking to her face to face then online (obviously, but I couldn't prepare). To be honest once again, I didn't think she'd look me directly in the eye when we were talking to eachother; but that's not how it went at all. Our eyes were locked maybe 75% of the time we were on topic. Which is good, because I can't talking to someone when they don't look at me directly, makes me feel like they either don't care or aren't paying attention...but it went well.

We started out on the backyard porch. I believe we were both very nervous and had really no idea what to say. I can't exactly remember who 'started' the discussion, but she was the first one to say, "Ok..so lets talk.". We spoke both on topic and off topic, just to clear our systems out I guess with the off topic stuff (which I enjoyed.). It made me feel more relaxed. She noticed that a 'group' of cats were in the shack next door. She loves cats, and well any animal for that matter. We spoke 50 - 50 on topic off topic when outside. Eventually an off-topic thing led to us going inside for a small tour of the house. Then after the little tour we sat in the front living room and talked like 90% on topic.

We both basically know everything about what's going on now, but near the end she said she feels like there is something still missing. Maybe something we havn't spoken about. I felt the exact same way. I felt we poured everything we had out into the open, but that something was still missing ya know? Maybe it will come to me..cuz we never figured out what it was.

I now pretty much have the 'controller' in this matter...it's basically my choice wether to talk to her again or not. The meeting really cleared a lot of things up for me..but it doesn't really change the fact I still have feelings for her.

Will we talk again? Yup. Just a matter of when. Could be tomorrow, could be at school when school starts back up, or it could be in some odd years...I don't know.

The meeting ran a bit long because near the end we were forced to make a choice and whatnot. A choice really hasn't been determined, it's just really up to me how things go as I said above about the 'controller.'

After she left I pretty much just sat down and thought..because with her not there I thought maybe something else would come up. Sure enough, some stuff did (entered in private entry). But as she said during the meeting, "Say everything that's on your mind, cuz this is your last chance Trev." I'll never forget that.

So I guess I'll just see how things go from now on and see what happens. "Live for the Moment" I guess.

--TREV

Dr.Death · Post by **Dr.Death** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 4:19 pm

Well man, I'll tell ya, I've been there before. And I used to listen to alot of music in those times and I heard a lyric that made alot of sense and it said "Its better to have lost at love than never to have loved at all". I don't know if this is the right thing to say at the moment..........! But hope it works out for ya. I'd tell you who sang the song but you'd probably laugh at me, unless you know who sang it. Hang in there man.

Grudge · Post by **Grudge** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 4:31 pm

Well i hope things go well for ya Trev but remember one thing if you concentrate on one thing wholly you can lose site of alot of other things that's goin on or could be goin on. remember to keep your family close to ya and that they are the most imortant ppl in your life even if (alot of young ppl feel or felt this way I think) you think that you'd be better off without them, as i have gotten older I know now that your family can help you thru alot of stuff and they will always be there for you. well just step back from the whole thing take a deep breath and ask yourself the question objectively "Is this going to actually go anywhere?" It will (if you choose to) be hard to move on and look past her, I do know, but once you do, if, again, you choose to, you will have a clearer picture of what went on and it will be a great learning experience.. well I have no idea what i am talking about but good luck

TREV · Post by **TREV** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 6:16 pm

Thanks for those words of wisdom Grudge. I'm tryin'.

Thanks.

Falcon187420 · Post by **Falcon187420** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 8:45 pm

Ahhh...young love. Listen to grudge, he seems to have his head on straight. Don't completely focus on a woman Trev, it brings up weird things for women most of the time.
It's absolutely necessary to be honest with everyone and by being honest it will allow you to heal yourself, but laying it all out there gives too much power to the other person...therefore my advice would be:
Take some time to talk to other girls face to face to get past the nervousness, learn to keep some stuff to yourself because your mystery is intriguing, and most of all...do not put all of your energy into making something happen. If it's meant to happen, it will...believe in that.
Good luck to ya in all relationships, we all need some luck...LOL!

Grudge · Post by **Grudge** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 8:51 pm

Sure wish i had somewhere to talk like this when i was a pup. (Recruit Grudge)

TREV · Post by **TREV** » Mon Jul 14, 2003 9:11 pm

(Recruit Grudge) lol.

I can't imagine being alone during all this. I got a couple peeps to talk to other then my peeps here. heh..

FatGayOrc · Post by **FatGayOrc** » Wed Jul 16, 2003 12:55 am

like i said in another post TREV, Sockpuppets are the cure-all. The won't rip your heart out and feed it to you in front of her friends (and occasionally yours).

Seriously, let things run their own way. If you try to force something, it will not work to your liking in the end. If you focus all your existance on her, she will be creeped out and never speak to you again. If you give her space and earn her trust, her honeypot is yours for life.

After 30 years on God's trashed Earth, I believe I have mastered 1/10th of 1/10th of what makes a woman tick.

Which is:
1) no 2 women are alike even tho they are exactly the same thing (you have to make them feel different (special) from other women but they do have the same motivations in life (we are all human after all))

2) give them what they want relationship-wise but resist their attempt to make it "more" only to build up their hunger for more. never let them doubt that you want the relationship. show them you want it but ask them if it's what she wants. appear willing to work for her favor but remind her that your needs need to be met too. that way she knows you understand what a relationship is.

3) give her all your income

4) don't appear to be shiftless or directionaless. women still need to feel taken care of. it's not the 1950s but some women still need to feel a little subservant to feel "safe" or "cared for"

5) don't push her luck or your own. you'll end up on her bad side if you do

6) women like family. spend time with hers to comfort her idea of being your family

7) don't ever take advantage of a woman, just bolster her weaknesses so she feels your strength. women like strong men who can support their vulnerabilities

I'm going to bed. More to come if she lets me write more

never stay up later than they do

TREV · Post by **TREV** » Wed Jul 16, 2003 7:57 am

Ha. Loved that post Orc, thanks. But I think I have like a 1% chance of ever going out with her so, I'd like to save our friendship if possible...

but who was it that said "Being friends with women is only possible if you're gay." LoL. I think it was XoR. Ha.

Well we're meeting again on Thursday to talk some more. Joy.

TREV · Post by **TREV** » Wed Jul 16, 2003 8:10 pm

Well....now this is truly the final update.

I was just talking with her and her best friend (also one of my closer friends, also a girl) and we ended up getting into this huge arguement and ended up blocking eachother.

So that's it. I'm moving on. I'm just plain tired of it all.

Thanks for any and all support you guys have given me on this matter, thanks a lot. 0X

Grudge · Post by **Grudge** » Wed Jul 16, 2003 8:34 pm

Good luck, I think getting yourself away from such a time consuming and emotional pull, will let you see things clearly and in perspective, and in time you will see everything works out in the end, one way or the other.......or you go crazy and get committed for "your best intrests" well again Good Luck

FatGayOrc · Post by **FatGayOrc** » Wed Jul 16, 2003 9:55 pm

like i said, sockpuppets

XoR · Post by **XoR** » Wed Jul 16, 2003 11:17 pm

heheh Orc

did you have somethin goin on with Lambchops that we should know about?

Hmmm?

TREV · Post by **TREV** » Thu Jul 17, 2003 7:38 am

LoL!

Ok now she's emailed me and wants to talk face to face again...is it just me or am I not the only problem in this situation?!?

Ugh.

FatGayOrc · Post by **FatGayOrc** » Thu Jul 17, 2003 12:49 pm

Nothing you should know about, Xor, Really.

And Trev, you're not a problem...